Once Upon a Game: Quest for the Perfect Pizza (Signed PAPERBACK)

Genre: Middle Grade Fantasy, Action & Adventure, Humorous, LitRPG

Audience: Middle Schoolers & Teens

Generally speaking, these books are listed for ages 8-12. However, I have had parents read them to kids under 8, and there are plenty of teen readers and even adults!

In terms of content rating, they are similar to a PG movie. My books are family friendly, and can be enjoyed by all ages. There is no profanity, graphic content, or romance.

However, these books do contain combat and suspense, but it’s no different than what you’d see it your typical animated movie from Dreamworks, Pixar, Illumination, or similar.

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CHAPTER 2: Berry Pickin’

Just inside a tranquil wood, Noah crouched low in the dense underbrush. His shaggy brown hair fell into his face as he plucked a plump berry from its stem. Beside him, his brother Alex clanked and clattered with every movement, his metal armor protecting him from the thornier bushes.

“Ugh, berry picking again?” Alex grumbled, trying to maneuver his bulky hand through a tangle of branches. “Couldn’t you have picked a more exciting quest?”

“I know, I know,” Noah replied defensively. “But we aren’t strong enough to fight evil creatures. We only have three respawn tokens left thanks to that giant toad.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right, but you can’t deny these kinds of quests are so boring.”

“They are,” said Noah, “but—”

A sudden burst of yelps and shouts interrupted their banter. The boys exchanged curious glances.

“Sounds like someone’s in trouble,” said Noah.

“Yeah!” Alex’s eyes widened and a grin spread across his face. “That, or they’re just practicing their animal impressions. Either way, I’m going to investigate.”

“Wait, let’s not just charge in without—”

But it was too late. Alex withdrew his sword and sprinted through the trees toward the commotion, doing his very best to be as loud as possible.

“Typical,” Noah muttered, equipping a sleek bow from his back and following Alex.

Luckily, Alex was not fast. Not only did his armor slow him down, but Noah’s agility was much greater.

The sounds of battle grew louder as the two of them neared their target, and when they arrived, they knelt behind a few trees to stay out of sight.

Several yards in front of them, a grizzled adventurer was locked into combat with a gigantic wolf. The beast snarled and lunged at the man, who was ducking and diving out of the way to avoid getting bit.

“Yes! A Warden Wolf,” said Alex excitedly. “Come on. Maybe he’ll give us something for helping him.”

“No.” Noah reached to hold Alex back. “Don’t you remember the time we tried to help that lady who was getting chased by two ogres only to find out they were really her shapeshifting friends waiting to ambush us?”

Alex gave Noah an exasperated look. “Yeah, yeah. I know. But come on, Noah. Does this look like a trap to you?”

Noah glanced at the adventurer, who was trying to keep his distance by prodding the wolf with his wooden staff. “Not really, but those ‘ogres’ and that lady took some of our most valuable items. Let’s just sit back and see what happens. If he dies, we’ll take on the wolf, but if not, we leave him be.”

“Fine,” grumbled Alex, clearly disappointed. “But if that guy snuffs it, I get first dibs on any loot. Deal?”

“Yeah, alright.”

The adventurer, whose flowing purple robes were covered in dirt and leaves, shot a jet of green light at the wolf, missing by inches. The wolf lunged at him again, but the man was quicker and evaded the attack.

“Die, beastie!” the man shouted, then launched a fireball toward the wolf, striking it in the side. The flames ignited its fur, and it crumpled to the ground with a defeated whine shortly after.

“Ha, take that, you overgrown furball!” cried the adventurer.

The man was clearly a Wizard, and the display of elemental powers made Noah occasionally regret not picking a class that offered more magical abilities.

“Well,” Noah began, watching in awe as the man dusted off his hands, “guess he doesn’t need our help after all. Come on, Alex. Let’s get back to our berries.” He turned to leave.

“Wait, look!” Alex pointed at the wizard.

The man, who had set down his staff to examine the dead wolf, didn’t realize his robes were a little too close to the fiery orange glow that still kindled at the tip of his wooden weapon.

Seconds later, the robes caught fire. The man flailed and danced around, trying to extinguish the flames that were consuming him, but it was to no avail. The wizard fell motionless to the ground, just as the wolf had done moments before.

“Noob,” said Alex. “Oh, well. He’ll respawn back in town. No harm done.”

“Yeah, except to his pride,” Noah snickered.

“Looks like I got first dibs on the loot, then.” Alex smiled, then sheathed his sword.

Noah put his bow away, then the two of them approached the fallen adventurer. Alex, having first pick, promptly took the wizard’s staff.

“Basic staff of sorcery. Not bad,” said Alex.

“You know we can’t take other adventurers’ gear unless we are the ones to defeat them,” said Noah. “Besides, the Warrior class can’t even use a staff.”

“I know. I just wanted to check it out. It doesn’t look like he dropped any loot. Maybe you should check his quest log. There could be a tip on the location of some treasure or something.”

Noah crouched down and cautiously approached the smoldering backpack. It hissed slightly, and small puffs of smoke hit Noah in the face as he unzipped it.

As with all adventurers’ backpacks, everything inside was magically protected. Among the contents of this guy’s bag were a few potions, a bundle of herbs, a spellbook, a bestiary, and a standard Adventurer’s Almanac, a magical book that every adventurer possessed.

“Anything good in there?” asked Alex.

“Nothing out of the ordinary.”

“I figured.” Alex pretended to shoot fireballs out of the wizard’s staff, adding his own sound effects.

Noah extracted the wizard’s Almanac and opened it to the quest log. He squinted at the neat handwriting, noting the various tasks that ranged from mundane errands to daring monster hunts.

One quest, in particular, caught his eye as it mentioned a wolf. It was called “Pearly Whites.”

“It says here that an artist needs two wolf fangs for a sculpture she’s creating.”

“Two fangs, huh?” Alex’s gaze shifted toward the motionless body of the gigantic wolf nearby. “Well, good thing we have a very large wolf right here.”

“Want to take the fangs and find this artist? The reward is 250 gold.”

“Sure, why not?” Alex shrugged, his eyes brightening at the prospect of an unexpected adventure. “Sounds better than picking berries.”

“Alright then.” Noah stepped over to the wolf and used a small dagger to extract the two largest fangs.

“Cool,” Alex commented. “Those things are bigger than my hands.”

“Fangs: Inventory,” said Noah, and the fangs disappeared from his grip. “Now let’s see if we can find this artist.” Noah consulted the wizard’s quest log for further information. “It says she’s in a town called Pinecrest.”

“Pinecrest, huh?” Alex stroked his chin thoughtfully. “I think that’s fairly close to here. I’ve heard they have a good market.”

“Great,” said Noah. “I’ll check the map.”

Noah extracted his own Adventurer’s Almanac. It looked like any old book, featuring a dark brown leather cover with an image of a sword on the front. The pages of this book contained highly valuable information, such as a list of the adventurer’s current inventory, a quest log, and a map.

Though it seemed ordinary, it was far from it. Each section of an Adventurer’s Almanac would self-update. For example, the quest log would show progress toward objectives, like the number of berries picked. The inventory would automatically change as well, and Noah’s now contained the two wolf fangs he didn’t have before.

Also contained within the Almanac was a little pocket that held an enchanted map. Another invaluable object for any adventurer, the map would show its owner’s current location and even add new locations upon request. That was exactly what Noah used to locate the village of Pinecrest.

“Yep, you were right,” said Noah. “Pinecrest is only a few miles east of here. Ready to go?”

Alex sighed as the wizard’s staff disappeared from his hands, respawning with its owner. “I guess so.”

“Great.” Noah smiled. “Let’s go.”